Inside Hoda Kotb and Ex-Fiance Joel Schiffman’s Coparenting Arrangement: ‘There’s No Animosity’

Hoda Kotb and ex-fiancé Joel Schiffman are willing to do whatever they can to ensure that their daughters, Haley and Hope, are happy. The former couple’s coparenting arrangement “is different than most couples,” an insider exclusively tells Closer.

“They were never married; they’re both mature and aren’t fighting over stuff, so there’s no animosity,” the source adds. “Hoda is more of a hands-on parent. Joel isn’t, which is fine. It works for them.”

Hoda, 60, announced her breakup from Joel, 66, during an episode of Today in January 2022. They were together for 8 years and had gotten engaged in 2019. They adopted Haley, 7, and Hope, 5, in 2017 and 2019, respectively.

“Joel and I have had a lot of prayerful and meaningful conversations over the holidays and we decided that we’re better as friends and parents than we are as an engaged couple, so we decided we are going to start this new year … on our new path as loving parents to our adorable, delightful children, and as friends,” she said of their split during the episode.

Years later, Hoda opened up about the real reason why she and Joel decided to end things after nearly a decade together.

“Joel is one of the best people I know, and he really is a great human being,” the TV personality said during an August episode of The Jamie Kern Lima Show. “And I feel like I’m a pretty great human being, but sometimes two great human beings together isn’t quite enough to make it work.”

Hoda said that she and the financier were “growing at different paces,” making it hard for them to be “in sync.” Still, she valued their time together and is grateful for the beautiful family they created.

“I think a lot of people are probably in these situations,” the mom of two continued. “One person’s growing … or one person wants it this way, and one person wants it that way.”

Things are still amicable between them, as Joel joined the family to celebrate Christmas in Hoda’s new home in the suburbs in 2024. Hoda hung a stocking with Joel’s name on it above the fireplace as part of her Christmas decor this year.

She spoke out about her Christmas traditions with Joel and the kids and how excited she was to host the holiday celebration in her new home.

“This is our first year to have Christmas at our [new] home. I’m so excited because to have stockings hung in a place that you know will be the place that they’re going to be hanging for years,” Hoda said during a recent episode of Today. “We just for the first time decided where the tree was going to go, and we know from this day on, this is where it’s going to go … We decked our house out. Our Christmas isn’t huge because it’s me, my kids, my mom, my sister, Joel. We get together. That’s the group, and it’s kind of just a cozy Christmas.”